My Marine
This is my oldest boy, my 21-year-old son in his dress uniform. This was last year after he came back from The Sandbox the first time. He put on his uniform and came to my office so I (and all my co-workers who know him from when he was a little kid who made robot costumes from copier boxes when he visited the office) could see him in all his glory. This is the picture that I have right underneath my computer monitor that I gaze at every spare moment I have and pray over when I should be thinking about work.
It's funny because I am not a religious person as far as going to church, or any of the other outwardly religious ways. But I have my spiritual side and this side is praying on a daily basis, and I hope it helps him. Also, I guess that my brain was programmed by the Catholic upbringing, including the thousands of masses and rosaries and whatnot, and now, try as I might, I cannot NOT pray when I am seriously worried about something. My logical side says "Why pray? We are all God's children, and if God is listening to us he would answer all our prayers, not just pick and choose from whoever is getting through to him." And my motherly side says "I don't know what else to do, so I'm praying."
He is my son and of course, I adore him. He is at the same time, the strongest, most stubborn, most persistent person and yet he is the sweetest, most squishy-hearted, give-you-the-shirt-off-my back guy in the world. When he spent time with us before this deployment, he would tell us stories of things that had happened over there and this strong, automatic-weapon-carrying Marine cried over buddies that had been killed or hurt or maimed. He, and we, will never be the same.
God, please bring him back.
posted by Carmenzta @ 5:24 PM
25 Comments:
Jeez, Carmenzta, it's kind of scary, he looks like my brother who is also in the Marine Corps, just a generation older. As a matter of fact, in that earlier photo of you and your sis, you look like me and your sister looks like one of my nieces, like twins...no foolin'. If it matters, I'm 51, grew up in California. Of course, it doesn't hurt that I am also Latin-our mom was from Mexico. My brother was in Iraq, but is now in Germany, permanent assignment. Man, was I glad when THAT was over!
I don't know if this is quite OK or not, but could you please drop me a line at "eg1431-uk@yahoo.co.uk" please? I have something for you, a gift. No, it's nothing awful, and it's certainly up to you, your choice, but it might help right now. You're doing fine, it's just we have to stick together sometimes.
Thanks,
kat
Carm...
What a beautiful young man. Strong, with spirit, caring, feeling for his buddies...
And you, what a rock you must be for him, even as he is so far away, you must be everything to him...
This is just an amazing set of words and feelings, and he needs nothing more from you than the love you show for him when you say, "And my motherly side says I don't know what else to do, so I'm praying."
There is nothing more powerful than a mother's love. Not that it's needed, but I stand behind you and reinforce it and support it.
Hi Lovely. How often can he get in touch w/you???
We love you Carmy and so want it to all work out for you.
What on earth in this world can be worth putting people through that shit.
Kat, Thank you for your concern and for the wonderful gift. I will treasure it.
WW, I am usually a rock because I live in denial, which is not a bad thing for me! Thank you for always understanding my posts and the nice comments you make. It makes me feel a lot better.
Dyna, When he's not on a mission he calls almost every day. But when he's outside the Wire as they call it, he can't call so we just worry and write silly posts.
Tommy, You are a good and sweet friend, thanks for the support. To answer your question I would say: oil? It sucks, but it does make the world go round...
i'm not a religious person either, but praying is just as powerful as getting up and going to work to earn money instead of sitting around and wanting money. it is in the spiritual world, an act of assertion, a use of one's abilities to do what one can. i believe this strongly. in matters small and large, my prayers have been answered. this is true for everyone. you are praying even though you didn't use to as much because your very core being always knows what to do. we are instinctual animals and all we need to know we already know (with the exception of calculus) when moments of pure need are upon us, we revert to knowledge that is inherent, and true. much love, anna.
Anna, What a great comment. You don't need calculus, you are a genius and therefore it's of no use to you! Thank you, I needed that!
Anna, your comment was amazing. I truly believe that prayer is a powerful tool.
Your son is so beautiful Carmenzta. I'll keep him in my prayers. You too. What a wonderful mom you are...Big hugs.
oh stop with all the praise! (no really...some more???)
in all seriousness, i have noticed the power of prayer in my life lately. i've also noticed that the universe, god, whomever you refer to, sends you signals, thoughts, signs all the time. we communicate more than we know. with our voices, thoughts, bodies and hopes. it's all a network going on 24/7....it is the actual real internet...you know? and there are NO coincidences...
he's gorgeous, you must be very proud - thinking of you both
Anna, really few people have made such common-sense and yet spiritual comments. You're right that there are no coincidences, it's just that with our limited outlooks we can never tell how things are connected.
Ziggi, Thank you. I'm very proud of him and I appreciate your thoughts.
He is gorgeous. I'd pray for him too, but I've already sent one to the Patron Saint of Lost Things tonight, which Blogger has already gone and lost!
And besides, there's no prayers that can be more powerful than a mother's for her son. So I'm sending you both lots of very hard wishin' and hopin' xx
Pammy and Cherry, Thank you for the prayers, wishin' & hopin'. Every little bit helps!
He is a very handsome chap.
I don't do praying (I'm an agnostic) but sending positive thoughts for both of you.
I cannot even begin to imagine how you must be feeling.
Keep sending your maternal energy overseas to protect him. I believe that it is the most powerful force known to man.
All of that strong stubborn persistence will carry him home.
Think it.
Believe it.
Make it happen.
Yeah. Bring him back. All the oil in the world isn't worth it.
Hang in there. Iraq can't last for ever.
Anna, HE and Markie - Thank you for stopping by and for the good comments and thoughts. I appreciate all of them.
And Homey, you are so right about the maternal energy. It is very strong and overpowering, so it has to be positive!
arqhnjug - Two things that Noah had with him to help him through the flood.
arqhnjug -- what's that? And what's the flood? Sorry, haven't been keeping up on my Cuban Carm lately.
WW, it isn't completely clear to you? Go figure. Ark n Jug (o'liquor) to get Noah through the flood??? Ok what was I drinking (and thinking) yesterday when I wrote this?
hey girl, thought i'd stop by and say hello since you swung by my place!
When IS he back, Carm? You OK? You haven't posted anything new for quite a while.
Or are you keeping this post and his pic up as you maintain a vigil? At any rate, support you.
Same here Carmy. We're still here with you.
here! here!
WW, Pammy and Anna:
I haven't posted anything b/c we're in the middle of Fall registration and today is the first day of classes, so my office is wall-to-wall students. It's nice to hear from you! I'll be posting something when I get a chance.
WW, my son doesn't come back until February 2007. We haven't heard from him in a bit more than a week because they are on a mission... Thank you for thinking of us!
Great to hear, Carmenzta.
We'll be watching and visiting and beside you.
Post a Comment
<< Home